The world according to Alan

“Scientists have found the Higgs Boson recently. Still no word on the G-spot though!” - Jay Leno who has an unhappy wife.

I’ve been going over my recent posts and realized it has been nothing but Romney. So here’s a little Alan update:

- I moved to Northern Ontario. It is much different than Toronto in that everyone here is always sad. The trees are nice, though.

- That’s it. That’s all that has changed. I’m still a pooping, masturbating, drunk, ignorant, directionless idiot. I’m having a blast.

Hope everyone else’s life is going just as fucking awesome as mine!

I love you.